Vive la femme is a French phrase with multiple meanings, one being to ‘live the feminine.’ In a postmodern world where women are discouraged from embracing the femininity that God gave them, it is critical that we reclaim who we are.
There is nothing weak or inadequate about being a woman. In fact, those who succeed–not only in the Kingdom but in their careers and communities–are those who respect who they are. Women who attempt to adopt masculine characteristics not only fool themselves but experience confusion between God’s calling and their own identity.
Can a woman be successful in business? Yes! Can a woman minister with anointing? Yes. But only when she is honest with herself, others and God. I, therefore, encourage every woman of God to ‘live the feminine.’
Be the radiant, beautiful creature God meant you to be. Yes, we are more in touch with our emotions than men are…but what better gift to sympathise with the lost and offer compassion? Yes, our bodies are often physically softer and weaker…but what better way to understand–like Jesus–the feelings of others’ infirmities? Yes, we may notice a beautiful table setting or a fine recipe much more quickly than most men…but what better talent to help us be “given to hospitality” as a child of God must be?
Indeed, our gifts, our personalities, our moods, our bodies, and our thinking differ greatly from men.
However, we are not the polar opposite of men to be compared and measured against! We are their complement as they are ours!
We do not compete with our husbands; rather, husband and wife complete one another as they strive forward as a team!
Profile Of An Apostolic-Pentecostal Minister’s Daughter and Wife
I am a minister’s wife who felt a call to ministry myself at the early age of 14. My study of the Word began early on, earning me the name—even in elementary—of ‘the Bible Thumper.’ In elementary, I was either writing my own devotionals or working on one of my novels. Carrying a Bible everyday can make quite a difference in your life; as scripture teaches, truth separates!
Ministry and Me
As an elementary student, I seldom had friends to play with at recess. Instead, I spent my time under a large shade tree, reading my Bible and writing. By fourth grade, the animosity against the little Bible thumper escalated from avoiding me to pushing me into the walls of the school.
One particular attack led to a bloody lip and a blow that shifted my pelvic bone down and forward. My visits to the chiropractor began at this time and I still experience a lot of back pain from the incident. Close friends have even noticed that my hips are a little lop-sided, thanks to the pelvic bone that has never been able to stay in place after the attack. For a time, I felt almost like Jacob whose devotion to God led to his limping for the rest of his life. These moments of humiliation didn’t shake my faith in God; if anything, it made me more determined to stand for who I was and who I believed in.
God saw that faith and honored it. As a teenage girl, our small home missions church lacked a youth leader for several years. As my parents worked to teach Bible studies and build the church, I was given charge of the youth group. Every week I would teach a small lesson or arrange some activity. I began teaching Sunday School as well by age fifteen.
Where did we get a youth group? In high school, my stand for God and my determination to carry my Bible with me everywhere began to pay off. It began with a girl in the high school bathroom. I had left class to take a break and when I entered the bathroom, she was washing her hands at the sink. Upon seeing me, she asked if she could talk to me about that Bible I always carried. It turned out that her mom had been very ill and she wanted someone to pray for her. We prayed right there together. After that, two others met me in the bathroom with questions about the Bible.
Finally, several of my classmates braved the taunts and asked me to eat lunch with them. Those lunch breaks—usually at Wendy’s—consisted of Bible studies. Throughout high school, I helped to win fourteen young people, some of whom are ministers and ministers’ wives today. Recently, several of those wonderful friends were brought back together at my wedding!
College presented a new challenge…finding myself amidst the many career choices offered by guidance counselors. Although I wanted to attend a Bible college, I remembered how both of my parents had been forced to work full-time jobs to keep the home missions work afloat. If I wanted to do a work for the Lord, I needed to make certain I could survive in the world.
The choice of career would have been simple had it not been for God. You see, I’m a writer. And I always have been. As a young child, I would write little skits for my cousins and me to act out for the rest of the family. As a preteen, I began writing novels; I currently have three that, with careful editing and fine-tuning, I could publish from those years! By the time I was fifteen, I had published several poetic works in group anthologies. Writing has always been important to me.
The question? Could God use an English major? Would he need a Ph.D in English?
I was nineteen when I had finished my first year of college as an English major and I was wondering how God could use an English major. My parents had come to Oklahoma Camp Meeting with me that year.
They didn’t know how conflicted I was about my choice of career at that time. One night, I was praying in the altar for guidance when my mother interrupted me. She had never interrupted me in prayer before so I was quite surprised. She told me that there was a woman there that I just had to meet. I obediently wiped my face and followed her. She took me to meet Sister Pat Williams.
She is a phenomenal woman who, despite not being authorized by the UPCI as a missionary, had paid her own way to Belarus to minister to the hungry there. She taught victims of Chernobyl…as a professor of English. The career had opened the door for her to minister to souls in a place where missionaries were not allowed.
It was one of the most uplifting conversations I’ve ever had. God could use me…a writer, a poet, an English professor. God could use me!
Later, as I completed my Bachelor’s Degree, God opened another door in my ministry. Although I have never called myself a preacher, I do indeed feel a call to teach the Word. My father had never agreed with women ministering in the church; perhaps that is why I struggled so much to accept the call of God on my life.
In June of 2003, I was staying with my parents at their pastorate in Oklahoma as I searched for a job. My father had recently attended ‘Because of the Times,’ and had been moved by a sermon by elder Sister Mangun. He had admitted that, indeed, women could be used mightily in the pulpit. My first week with my parents, my father came down very sick. He is usually a very healthy person; in fact, I can count on one hand how many times I’ve known him to be ill. That Wednesday, however, he simply would not be able to preach.
My mother, remembering how I had ministered to the youth in our home missions work, asked him if he would like me to take care of the service. It seemed to take him off-guard but it was better than canceling service so he agreed. That night I taught my first ‘sermon,’ called ‘The Chosen of the Called.’ My father wanted to be there to hear me; what is funny is that no one showed that night except my father, mother, and brother. My first sermon was preached to my family…the toughest audience.
That night, after my message, my parents and brother joined me in the altar. Later, dad asked me why I hadn’t told him I felt a call of God on my life. I never had to say it. Since that time, he’s encouraged me in my ministry and has even been one of my main supports for this website!
Although we at times lock horns, both being perfectionists, my dad has always been one of my biggest fans! And the feeling is mutual!
Currently, I assist in leading our worship services, direct the women’s ministry, and serve as our church secretary. Yes, I’m a very busy girl!
'Outside of Ministry' Me
Aside from my work in ministry, I am an ordinary housewife and career woman. Indeed, God can use anyone. My work life has been varied and successful. From teaching the Deaf to managing a nursing facility, from teaching college to serving as a district sales specialist for a financial institution, I’ve worked with the youngest to the eldest, the most refined to the least sophisticated, and those full of dreams to those whose chance for further dreams has come to an end.
I’d like to think that such a wide array of experience has provided me a bird’s eye view of human nature and the need for God in each human life! From working in a funeral home and a nursing home to teaching kindergarteners how to spell, I’ve noticed that every moment in life is important. There isn’t a more important age or span of time in life; it all accounts for something!
On a personal level, I was recently married in 2010 to the most awesome, young minister, Nathan Torsy. He’s the kind of person who loves everyone he meets, never meets a stranger, and never gives up on anyone. I’ve learned so much from him!
So, as the song says, this is who I am. I’m not perfect…but I am redeemed!
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